Page 143 - EMBRACE Book

Owen, Rwanda
“I went to school up to secondary level. But I
dropped out before finishing. After I dropped out, I
started taking drugs and participating in other risky
behaviours. I got my then girlfriend, who was under
age at the time, pregnant. I was afraid that if people
in the community found out, they would take me to
the police, so I ran away to Kigali.
When I arrived in Kigali, life didn’t go the way I
expected it. So I began taking more drugs. I was
almost arrested once, but the police believed my lies
and released me. I returned home soon after that.
At home I was desperate and depressed. I was no
longer interested in my friends and didn’t talk to
anyone. My friends were finishing secondary school.
I felt jealous of them and isolated myself even
further. My ex-girlfriend gave birth to a healthy boy,
but I didn’t give her any support. When the Club for
Prevention of Unwanted Pregnancies started in our
community, she began attending. I wasn’t
interested.
As my depression continued, I spent all my time
sleeping at my parents’ home.
One day my son’s mother came to me and said, ‘I
142 forgive you. It is up to you to come and see your
child or not.’ She would visit my parents often, but I
was too afraid to open up and talk to her about my
problems. I thought she was trying to find a way to
take me to prison or to leave the baby with me.
However, all she did was invite me to the club and
told me that if I go it will help me to reduce my
depression.
She started sharing her experiences with the club
and said that since she joined the club her life has
changed. She had moved on with her life and was at
peace with herself and me. I told her that I would
think about joining. But I really had no intention of
going as I thought that it would be biased in favour
of the girls over the boys.
Photo: © 2019 ADRA | Sonja Fraser
I later decided to go to the club but with the purpose
of fighting their ideas and what they were sharing.
However, when I attended and heard what they
were discussing, I was impressed. I started
attending their meetings regularly.
At the club, I learned about being responsible for
my body. Before, I use to think it was not necessary
to protect myself. I learned about the consequences
of not using protection and of the effects that
engaging in intercourse at an early age have on
your body, especially for young ladies. This
information greatly inspired me to change as I could
relate to everything that I learned.
During the first weeks of attending the club’s
meeting, the members were wary about my
presence because they knew that I had ulterior
motives for attending. However, after seeing the
changes in my attitude they started including me in
group activities. I was able to receive a loan from
the club to begin a small business.
I was still struggling with my drug problem but
hiding it from the other club members. My drug use
was so extreme that I could not even afford to buy
myself a shirt or shoes.
However, when I received the loan, I decided to take 143
control of my life and use the money wisely. I
started selling sweet potatoes in my village that I
bought from other farmers. I also started sharing
my story and giving advice to other young men who
were heading down the same path I had.
I reconciled with my ex-girlfriend and now, I visit
my four-year-old son frequently. He is my pride and
joy.
I thank ADRA every day for initiating the club and
for giving me an opportunity to change my life.”